Blogging

Writing a blog is good. It dates the events that made me happy, hurts or upsets and it put dates to the events so that when you want to remember, they are just clicks away. It feels so much safer to blog as well since it's online and you wont misplace a virtual dairy as long as you remember your password. You can choose to open your dairy public or just keep it private.

Two days ago, i felt very disappointed. Ring tones that came out from my husband's handphone at 11plus p.m. lead to me finding out,thru' his saved messages, tat he has been gambling. Betting on football matches online. I saw passwords to the account and credit of money records in his saved messages box. Of course there's no way of denying when confronted. He said that it is because of the huge amount of tax demanded from IRAS. I'm not believing it but I'm very upset.

Then i realised that he deletes all his photos from his facebook account after adding me as a friend. What is he so secretive about?

Sometimes I think to myself that I just treat his "expenses" as expenses. Like, me buying an LV bag every 2-3 months. His losses in gambling can be expensed out and I wont feel so bad over his activity. Am i right to be thinking like that? Yes, he definitely can do that, provided that he doesnt steal from me and pay bills on time and doesnt borrow from me. Right. This should be the way. But it's not.

He is leaving for Perth for at least 4 months from this Sunday. It is a good time I take a break from all his nonsense. If he is still gambling and entering huge debts while in Australia, I should be seeing no future with him and I hope god can give me the strength to leave him.

It's not marriage is he is not making efforts on his end. There's no "together thru' thick and thin" shit in this event because it's just not worth it.